Your Awesome Guide To Living Independently

“FREEEEEEEDOM!!!!” | Photo courtesy of e84freedom.wordpress.com

This is a guest post from my friend, Angge.

That's the battle cry I want to shout when I first step into my newly-painted space in the boarding house I'm currently living in. I am a loner by nature so I was so thrilled when I finally had the chance to move out of our home and be on my own (Weeee! *cartwheels*). Finally! After nine years (that includes college days for I studied in Manila) of commuting for one and a half or two hours going to school or work, staying in a boarding house near the place I work is really a comfort.

Why didn't I decide earlier to move out? Two words: budget constraints. When I was still a student, my parents couldn't afford to pay for a dormitory or a boarding house rent so I traveled for hours everyday. Now that I can support myself, I've decided to be on my own. I still go to our home every weekend though to spend time with my family and fulfill my church duties and responsibilities.

But what does it mean by living independently?

All By Yourself

Being independent for me means doing different chores for yourself and by yourself. When I was living with my family, I don't do the laundry not because I'm lazy doing it but because my mom does it for me. And I usually spend more time traveling and working so most of the time, I'm too tired to wash my own clothes. Now, I have to schedule a laundry day once a week or else I would resort to “Side A-Side B” system. (And that's freakin' gross!)

It also means eating alone most of the time. For some, eating is a social activity whether they are doing it at home or in a restaurant or fastfood. Meal time is a time to interact with your parents, siblings, or friends as you share the food with them. When you are living alone, most of the time you have no choice but to cook or buy your own food and eat it alone. It can be sad (*enter background music, Alone by Heart*) especially if you are not used to it but as time goes by, you'll realize that eating alone is not the most depressing thing that will happen to you. Shake off that emo feeling and think that eating is filling your body with nutrients not another drama moment. (So turn off the dramatic background music now.)

My eating companions!

Rediscovering One's Self

Being independent means experiencing personal growth. You have all the time in your hands and the coolest part, no one is there to reprimand you (unless you have a nosy neighbor or roommate). BUT (as in capital B-U-T) it doesn't mean that you are absolutely free to do whatever things that you want to do ALL your life — it means controlling yourself not to do silly things that will make you suffer at the end. It's like being a parent to yourself. You have to take care of yourself because nobody will do it for you. Living alone and independently are two of the ultimate maturity tests for me. It's about forgetting my 'Peter Pan' syndrome and starting to act and think like a real adult and become responsible for my actions.

I love being independent. This sense of freedom is helping me to become resilient. Being alone most of the time gives me time and space to learn more things and new things that help improve myself. Spending time with myself helps me know myself more, understands myself much better, and loves myself even more.

Benefits Without a Doubt!

If you think that living independently means days without sunshine, well you have to start thinking that rainy days are not that bad either. Living alone gives you more time to rest, to contemplate, to enhance yourself, and to become more productive if you just know how to manage your time and channel your energy. Stop planning your shower cry, pillow cry, or whatever kind of cry that you are planning, instead, focus on certain things that can make you a better person. Think of the book that you'll be reading next, or the art activity you are wanting to start, or the recipe you wanting to cook, or the next TV series you'll be wanting to watch!

New Girl... my new favorite series! Yay!

So if you have the courage and resources (and if your parents let you), move out of your home! Live independently... but always remember to don't and NEVER screw things up! Freedom is always a choice... but it is not absolute! God gave us free will; we choose the path that we are going to take but responsibilities always go with it. Life's what we make it — mess with it, you'll end up miserable or live it, you'll end up fulfilled.

Remember the credo: “I'm alone but not lonely.” *wink wink*

PS: Emo moments are not bad, you have to keep a playlist of sad songs (mostly Adele songs) to keep you company if you feel like being sad once in a while. Just don't do it very often or you'll end up having suicidal tendencies or worse, locked up in an asylum. ;)

"Maybe... just maybe... I'll set fire to the rain! Bwahahahaha"